Astronomy Domine

[caddyman]

This report from Auntie tells us that scientists are meeting in Prague to reclassify certain astronomical bodies in the solar system. If they agree, and it seems likely that they will, we will no longer have 9 planets in the solar system, but 12. Pluto will be relegated to the “second division” of planets along with newcomers, Ceres, Charon and the only one with its own post code: Xena (2003 UB313).

Ceres is in orbit between Mars and Jupiter and may or may not be classified as a planet but the largest (known) asteroid although it is spherical, while Pluto, Charon and Xena, right out at the far reaches of the system are likely to be reclassified as dwarf planets, or Plutons¹, which are bodies with enough gravity to arrange themselves into a largely spherical shape. There is some dispute about Charon; some astronomers suggest it is a moon of Pluto, others call it a twin planet (or, I suppose, pluton).

I quite liked the idea of plutons exerting enough gravity to form globes until I looked in the mirror. Suddenly I’m not so sure, maybe we should stick with “icy dwarfs”, though that would just transfer body image problems from me to small people².

With all the talk of Kuiper Belts and Oort Clouds and such, I wonder why there has been no mention of the Van Halen Belt, that small area of stars that spills out Hard Rock? ³.


¹Send all jokes based around Who Killed the Plutons elsewhere, please. Unless they are really good.

²But they’re only short arses, so who cares?

³Yes, I know. And I don’t care, so nyah, nyah, nyah..

Comments

[mr-h-r-hughes.livejournal.com]

So assuming that Xena is not named after a dodgy fantasy series who or what was Xena, I'm assuming something greek to go along with pluto and charon. Explanation please from somebody with a classical education.

[caddyman.livejournal.com]

So assuming that Xena is not named after a dodgy fantasy series

I suggest that you don't make that assumption...

[caffeine-fairy.livejournal.com]

Nope, it's named after Xena, Warrior Princess. The Times says so...

[sack-boy.livejournal.com]

2003 UB313 was "nick-named" Xena by the Astronomologists that found it, according to a report on Auntie back in February. "If granted such a classification, the object would assume a name from Greek or Roman mythology." And they did, in deed, nick-name it after said Telly Box serial.

[mr-h-r-hughes.livejournal.com]

I hereby declare the death of western civillisation. Goodbye, I'm off to beat myself to death with copy of Medea

[keresaspa.livejournal.com]

Surely Vulcan would be the logical (no pun intended) choice for a new planet, notwithstanding Gene Rodenberry having already swiped it.

[fencingsculptor.livejournal.com]

If you were suggesting naming it after it's Star Trek connotation, you may choose Heavy Book of Mythology or my boot...

Your choice.

Oh to heck with it, .... I'll even offer a Nerve Pinch (TM Paramount Pictures) if you like

[keresaspa.livejournal.com]

The planet Nerve Pinch certainly has a ring to it - 'NASA probe reaches Nerve Pinch' as a headline, anyone.

[romney.livejournal.com]

Xena has a moon, which is unofficially named Gabrielle

[mrssshhh.livejournal.com]

I was going to mention that, but there's no need.

p.s. Hello Bryan

[caddyman.livejournal.com]

Hello, Neil!