Office foliage
The world’s most miserable tree has appeared in our office by the window. It’s a tree because it is indoors, outside it would be a sapling.
Now a healthy tree has a canopy that literally blocks out the sun. Even a young tree has a healthy covering of leaves if not as impressive a set as a mature specimen. This sad little thing has a single leaf for every foot of branch, and most of them are yellowy green rather than a good, rich green.
A little later when no one’s looking, I am going to give it a cup of coffee. That’ll perk it up.
Now a healthy tree has a canopy that literally blocks out the sun. Even a young tree has a healthy covering of leaves if not as impressive a set as a mature specimen. This sad little thing has a single leaf for every foot of branch, and most of them are yellowy green rather than a good, rich green.
A little later when no one’s looking, I am going to give it a cup of coffee. That’ll perk it up.
no subject
If that does not work, try offering it a sacrifice. Suitable offerings do NOT include:
Unwanted liquids, however sourced;
Fag-ends;
Grape pips, orange peel etc. even if you claim it is compost or mulch;
Compost or mulch;
Paper-clips;
Toffee papers.
You might try spilling the blood of an office junior on its roots. If the tree improves, work you way up the management chain until the thing is sturdy enough to hang the Minister from its branches.
no subject
How well do "romneys" mulch?
no subject
*even more confused about plants*
cider is ok though, yes?
no subject
If X sacrifices to Y something that Y actually needs, it implies that X has some sort of hold over Y. So what Y should demand is something that is not needed, but which is precious to X or causes X some special effort to obtain.
So, in this case, mulch is not a worthy sacrifice. However, yes, cider is a possibility, particulary if Caddy is required to snatch the stuff from under the nose of DT ("special effort" = "having your fingers broke off, minced, mixed with broken glass and fed back to you")
So he wants his twig to grow up into a Whomping Willow, he shold make with the libations/plastc surgery rather than with the Sage's dog.
no subject