By way of getting the message across without actually swearing!
I know I can't sew. But I just had to try it anyway did I not? Oh yes. And it took me bloody ages.
All I was doing was trying to stitch down the collar on my frock coat of many colours - it has a habit of curling up at the back. Velvet, you see - proper velvet, none of this crushed rubbish, to quote
magpye who kindly arranged for the assemblage of said garment.
Now a fab and groovy coat it is, but the collar curl narks me a tad.
So, thinks I. A hook and eye (poetic) will do the trick. Well so it might if applied by someone with dexterity greater than an arthritic gnu.
Tomorrow I shall unpick my handiwork and contemplate the possibilities of small strips of Velcro.
Not tonight, though. My patience has reduced to the level where the thought of shredding something seems very, very satisfying.
And I like the coat far too much for that. Plus, of course, it cost a number of shillings commensurate with the skill of the fabricator which is somewhat greater than mine in these matters (by an extraordinarily large factor).
So I shall bide my time. Think pleasant thoughts. Achieve a Zen-like calm.
And kick a plastic bottle around the kitchen for ten minutes.
That'll do the trick.
I know I can't sew. But I just had to try it anyway did I not? Oh yes. And it took me bloody ages.
All I was doing was trying to stitch down the collar on my frock coat of many colours - it has a habit of curling up at the back. Velvet, you see - proper velvet, none of this crushed rubbish, to quote
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Now a fab and groovy coat it is, but the collar curl narks me a tad.
So, thinks I. A hook and eye (poetic) will do the trick. Well so it might if applied by someone with dexterity greater than an arthritic gnu.
Tomorrow I shall unpick my handiwork and contemplate the possibilities of small strips of Velcro.
Not tonight, though. My patience has reduced to the level where the thought of shredding something seems very, very satisfying.
And I like the coat far too much for that. Plus, of course, it cost a number of shillings commensurate with the skill of the fabricator which is somewhat greater than mine in these matters (by an extraordinarily large factor).
So I shall bide my time. Think pleasant thoughts. Achieve a Zen-like calm.
And kick a plastic bottle around the kitchen for ten minutes.
That'll do the trick.