Crap

Today your correspondent finds himself, metaphorically speaking, sitting under a very big funnel with a small nozzle pointed directly at him.

Every pigeon in Christendom is relieving itself in the funnel.

My only consolation is that the flex is not long enough to reach from the fan to the power outlet, otherwise mighty fun would ensue.

I am bearing this all so far with steadfast good humour, for my mood is bulletproof. That said, my reserves of patience are thin, and I am beginning to allow my trademark sarcasm and cynicism for all matters official pervade everything I do today. Call it a safety mechanism if you will. I like to think of it as siphoning off all those upsetting negative emotions and giving people the information they require to realise that today is going to be a bad day to upset me.

I am not upset yet, though, and I will recover, but the devil in my head is on an extremely short leash and he hasn't been exercised for a while. He's hungry and needs to stretch his legs. First person out of line gets him full force.

Most of you have never seen me lose my temper. It makes me feel good from time to time; I cannot say the courtesy is extended to people within its range.

Fair warning.

That is all.

Crap

Today your correspondent finds himself, metaphorically speaking, sitting under a very big funnel with a small nozzle pointed directly at him.

Every pigeon in Christendom is relieving itself in the funnel.

My only consolation is that the flex is not long enough to reach from the fan to the power outlet, otherwise mighty fun would ensue.

I am bearing this all so far with steadfast good humour, for my mood is bulletproof. That said, my reserves of patience are thin, and I am beginning to allow my trademark sarcasm and cynicism for all matters official pervade everything I do today. Call it a safety mechanism if you will. I like to think of it as siphoning off all those upsetting negative emotions and giving people the information they require to realise that today is going to be a bad day to upset me.

I am not upset yet, though, and I will recover, but the devil in my head is on an extremely short leash and he hasn't been exercised for a while. He's hungry and needs to stretch his legs. First person out of line gets him full force.

Most of you have never seen me lose my temper. It makes me feel good from time to time; I cannot say the courtesy is extended to people within its range.

Fair warning.

That is all.