Kill, murder, maim - see harm

I have just had a Positively 4th Street moment. (Bob Dylan fans will know what I mean).

Right now there is a person I should dearly like to skewer like a kebab and roast slowly on an open fire. I haven't decided on whether he needs basting, yet. Probably.

Still, calm, calm, calm.

In an hour I shall be content with mere evisceration, an hour after that a simple flaying will do. As the day passes and he keeps out of my way I shall probably lower my demands progressively through the iron maiden and wrack, to a simple pressing.

By early afternoon, I shall be content to administer a merciful beheading.

As things are, though, and given that all those fabulous old Anglo-Saxon laws have long since dropped out of use, I daresay a stiffly worded e-mail will have to do.

Sometimes civilisation just ain't what it's cracked up to be.

Kill, murder, maim - see harm

I have just had a Positively 4th Street moment. (Bob Dylan fans will know what I mean).

Right now there is a person I should dearly like to skewer like a kebab and roast slowly on an open fire. I haven't decided on whether he needs basting, yet. Probably.

Still, calm, calm, calm.

In an hour I shall be content with mere evisceration, an hour after that a simple flaying will do. As the day passes and he keeps out of my way I shall probably lower my demands progressively through the iron maiden and wrack, to a simple pressing.

By early afternoon, I shall be content to administer a merciful beheading.

As things are, though, and given that all those fabulous old Anglo-Saxon laws have long since dropped out of use, I daresay a stiffly worded e-mail will have to do.

Sometimes civilisation just ain't what it's cracked up to be.

Introspection

The last couple of days there's been a great deal of introspection in this forum.

westernind, has had something of a crisis of confidence over her ability to write and even posted a 'meme' about it.

Why do I write? Well, these days it's about the only creative outlet I have that doesn't demand more space than I can spare. As long as I have the room for a monitor and keyboard, I can write. Painting, and to a lesser extent, drawing demands space. And space is a commodity in short supply here at Chez Caddyman.

This is not to say that I don't wish to paint or draw, or that I prefer to write, but I have to pin my demons to something and currently this is it. In the past, I would paint or draw them. Now I grumble in cyberspace. Up until 18 months ago I hadn't written anything more challenging than a birthday card outside of the office. Then I somehow inveigled my way into NWO - a big wooden club was involved, if I recall correctly, and I started typing. I haven't really stopped since, although as I have said before, I don't really have any plotlines to develop outside NWO.

Having said that, I am hoping that an idea that magpye and I had for some collaborative humour might come to something. I've started it off and the ball is in her court right now. Unfortunately, I'm getting itchy typing fingers again, so I might push it along a bit further and then adapt it as and when any input comes in from Ms Pye.

Of course, the ideal would be to write and illustrate the damned thing myself, but right now I want to get at least a chapter on 'paper' - there's nothing quite like having a corpus of work already typed to get the creative juices flowing; the first hurdle is by far and away the hardest.

We'll see how it goes, though I remain optimistic and enthused right now, I am aware from previous experience that if I don't stick to it the energy will drain away. (This, incidentally, is why I am already researching new stuff for Rome, much to pax_draconis' silent horror).

What piece of work am I most proud of? Sadly, it's a character sheet. I hope the player enjoyed reading Galerius as much as I enjoyed writing him. That was one of those times when I just sat down with a coffee and took dictation. And I couldn't wait to hear his life story. Why 'sadly'? Because the character is now played and is unlikely to go any further. Every writer craves an audience, and the best seven or so pages I have ever written (in my own opinion) has been read by fewer than ten people.

C'est la vie.

I am hoping to write more humour. I don't know if it's funny, but it appeals to me, and in the final analysis, anything else is a bonus.

For the first time ever, I timed myself. This took 18 minutes to type - including nipping back to correct the typos I noticed as I went along.

Additional

Add another two minutes to upload again and edit!

Introspection

The last couple of days there's been a great deal of introspection in this forum.

westernind, has had something of a crisis of confidence over her ability to write and even posted a 'meme' about it.

Why do I write? Well, these days it's about the only creative outlet I have that doesn't demand more space than I can spare. As long as I have the room for a monitor and keyboard, I can write. Painting, and to a lesser extent, drawing demands space. And space is a commodity in short supply here at Chez Caddyman.

This is not to say that I don't wish to paint or draw, or that I prefer to write, but I have to pin my demons to something and currently this is it. In the past, I would paint or draw them. Now I grumble in cyberspace. Up until 18 months ago I hadn't written anything more challenging than a birthday card outside of the office. Then I somehow inveigled my way into NWO - a big wooden club was involved, if I recall correctly, and I started typing. I haven't really stopped since, although as I have said before, I don't really have any plotlines to develop outside NWO.

Having said that, I am hoping that an idea that magpye and I had for some collaborative humour might come to something. I've started it off and the ball is in her court right now. Unfortunately, I'm getting itchy typing fingers again, so I might push it along a bit further and then adapt it as and when any input comes in from Ms Pye.

Of course, the ideal would be to write and illustrate the damned thing myself, but right now I want to get at least a chapter on 'paper' - there's nothing quite like having a corpus of work already typed to get the creative juices flowing; the first hurdle is by far and away the hardest.

We'll see how it goes, though I remain optimistic and enthused right now, I am aware from previous experience that if I don't stick to it the energy will drain away. (This, incidentally, is why I am already researching new stuff for Rome, much to pax_draconis' silent horror).

What piece of work am I most proud of? Sadly, it's a character sheet. I hope the player enjoyed reading Galerius as much as I enjoyed writing him. That was one of those times when I just sat down with a coffee and took dictation. And I couldn't wait to hear his life story. Why 'sadly'? Because the character is now played and is unlikely to go any further. Every writer craves an audience, and the best seven or so pages I have ever written (in my own opinion) has been read by fewer than ten people.

C'est la vie.

I am hoping to write more humour. I don't know if it's funny, but it appeals to me, and in the final analysis, anything else is a bonus.

For the first time ever, I timed myself. This took 18 minutes to type - including nipping back to correct the typos I noticed as I went along.

Additional

Add another two minutes to upload again and edit!