Sunday, July 18th, 2004

(no subject)

Sunday, July 18th, 2004 06:05 pm
caddyman: (Default)
Back from the launderette and glad to be. No need to reiterate the fun that is the oppressive heat of the tumble drier in summer. It was not significantly different an experience from others I have posted up.

I am informed by my aged landlady, Mrs. Z, Grand Matriarch of the Polish Brigade tm that I should plan on getting a week's worth of showers in before 9am tomorrow morning. You see, in the grand tradition of house maintenance that requires something important, and preferably plastery drops off the house before she decides to do anything about it, we now have a hole in the porch above the front door that leads up into the bathroom.

The problem is that having installed a shower (one that actually works, as opposed to acting as decoration), she had one of her elderly Polish friends install a half-arsed shower curtain around the bath. Now, despite the fact that every time I go in there I put the shower curtain so it is properly inside the bath to allow the splashed water to run off into the bath and down the plug hole, many if not all of the Polish Brigade tm see this as an imposition on their showering space and hang the curtain outside the bath. Now if I can manage, and I'm big enough to look as though I've eaten any two of them, platforms and all, I don't see why they can't.

I always wondered where the water went, and now I know. Nowhere. It hid under the bath and slowly ate the floor and porch roof away. A bit of me is disappointed that we didn't have one of those Laurel and Hardy moments where some moustachioed bloke with a loofah and a look of surprise found the bath, bathroom floor and himself sitting in a cloud of masonry plaster in the hall way. On the other hand it would probably have happened to me if it happened to anyone, so probably better it didn't happen.

Anyway, it's all come home to roost now, oh yes. It's going to take 4 days to fix the bathroom, apparently. Again with the cheap. Ah well, this is going to be fun, but as long as there's water there's a way.

(no subject)

Sunday, July 18th, 2004 06:05 pm
caddyman: (Default)
Back from the launderette and glad to be. No need to reiterate the fun that is the oppressive heat of the tumble drier in summer. It was not significantly different an experience from others I have posted up.

I am informed by my aged landlady, Mrs. Z, Grand Matriarch of the Polish Brigade tm that I should plan on getting a week's worth of showers in before 9am tomorrow morning. You see, in the grand tradition of house maintenance that requires something important, and preferably plastery drops off the house before she decides to do anything about it, we now have a hole in the porch above the front door that leads up into the bathroom.

The problem is that having installed a shower (one that actually works, as opposed to acting as decoration), she had one of her elderly Polish friends install a half-arsed shower curtain around the bath. Now, despite the fact that every time I go in there I put the shower curtain so it is properly inside the bath to allow the splashed water to run off into the bath and down the plug hole, many if not all of the Polish Brigade tm see this as an imposition on their showering space and hang the curtain outside the bath. Now if I can manage, and I'm big enough to look as though I've eaten any two of them, platforms and all, I don't see why they can't.

I always wondered where the water went, and now I know. Nowhere. It hid under the bath and slowly ate the floor and porch roof away. A bit of me is disappointed that we didn't have one of those Laurel and Hardy moments where some moustachioed bloke with a loofah and a look of surprise found the bath, bathroom floor and himself sitting in a cloud of masonry plaster in the hall way. On the other hand it would probably have happened to me if it happened to anyone, so probably better it didn't happen.

Anyway, it's all come home to roost now, oh yes. It's going to take 4 days to fix the bathroom, apparently. Again with the cheap. Ah well, this is going to be fun, but as long as there's water there's a way.

Soft Porn

Sunday, July 18th, 2004 06:31 pm
caddyman: (Opus)
Well I guess that got your attention.

I have been wondering whether or not to post this up since [livejournal.com profile] boroshan scanned it for me. Not that it's particularly rude or anything, but because I couldn't make up my mind whether it was worth the effort.

The original was on A4 size paper, and is a mixture of pencil, crayon, water colour and gouache. I have never mastered the less is more school of water colour painting and feel cheated if the paint isn't thick enough in places to cast shadows. Unfortunately this has a knock on effect when scanning, as does the rippled effect once-wet paper has. Add to that the fact that the average scanner blows a picture up to as large as it can get away with and every imperfection you never noticed is suddenly highlighted in all its multi-hued glory.

Anyway, the result is that I have tinkered with the scan using Paint Shop Pro, softening here, highlighting there, and blending a bit all over. The work has been done on the flesh tones - I have left the stockings and background as scanned. I just felt the poor dear could do without the cellulite and pimples the scanner had given her (trust me when I say that this is not apparent on the original). I haven't altered the picture in any other way (except a little colour correction), so the mightily powerful upper arm is as painted originally. The effect is exaggerated by the pose, that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

The picture itself is hidden behind this cut to protect bandwidth and delicate sensibilities - though as I say it, isn't particularly rude. )

Oddly enough, when I was dithering over whether or not to include the picture on this journal, it was three of my female readers who suggested I should. You only have yourselves to blame, ladies.

Soft Porn

Sunday, July 18th, 2004 06:31 pm
caddyman: (Opus)
Well I guess that got your attention.

I have been wondering whether or not to post this up since [livejournal.com profile] boroshan scanned it for me. Not that it's particularly rude or anything, but because I couldn't make up my mind whether it was worth the effort.

The original was on A4 size paper, and is a mixture of pencil, crayon, water colour and gouache. I have never mastered the less is more school of water colour painting and feel cheated if the paint isn't thick enough in places to cast shadows. Unfortunately this has a knock on effect when scanning, as does the rippled effect once-wet paper has. Add to that the fact that the average scanner blows a picture up to as large as it can get away with and every imperfection you never noticed is suddenly highlighted in all its multi-hued glory.

Anyway, the result is that I have tinkered with the scan using Paint Shop Pro, softening here, highlighting there, and blending a bit all over. The work has been done on the flesh tones - I have left the stockings and background as scanned. I just felt the poor dear could do without the cellulite and pimples the scanner had given her (trust me when I say that this is not apparent on the original). I haven't altered the picture in any other way (except a little colour correction), so the mightily powerful upper arm is as painted originally. The effect is exaggerated by the pose, that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

The picture itself is hidden behind this cut to protect bandwidth and delicate sensibilities - though as I say it, isn't particularly rude. )

Oddly enough, when I was dithering over whether or not to include the picture on this journal, it was three of my female readers who suggested I should. You only have yourselves to blame, ladies.

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