Get a move on!

I think today must be National Move Like A Snail Day, or National Stand Around Chatting Day.

Well, I'm sorry to break into your leisure time, kids, but when I am at the end of a queue that’s ten people long and lengthening, I rather expect you chavs to stop your slack-jawed yokelling and go and help the single person engaged in honest toil amongst the banks of empty tills. I mean, Marks and Spencer must be able to pay you a reasonable sum since "It's not just food, it's (arse-reamingly expensive) M&S food."

I know that in that particular location you have a largely captive clientele base, but come on.

/rant

Get a move on!

I think today must be National Move Like A Snail Day, or National Stand Around Chatting Day.

Well, I'm sorry to break into your leisure time, kids, but when I am at the end of a queue that’s ten people long and lengthening, I rather expect you chavs to stop your slack-jawed yokelling and go and help the single person engaged in honest toil amongst the banks of empty tills. I mean, Marks and Spencer must be able to pay you a reasonable sum since "It's not just food, it's (arse-reamingly expensive) M&S food."

I know that in that particular location you have a largely captive clientele base, but come on.

/rant

Me stomick thinks me froat's bin cut

I am starving and am eyeing my lunch very closely. I think that I can grit my teeth and hold off diving into my desk drawer for the sarnies and fruit until at least 12.30, but it will be a damned close call.

I’m normally fine in the morning – the bowl of Rice Krispies and endless cups of coffee keep me ticking over nicely, but today…

That’s not thunder you hear, nor are they after shocks from yesterday’s geological wobble. ‘Tis my tum grumbling

Me stomick thinks me froat's bin cut

I am starving and am eyeing my lunch very closely. I think that I can grit my teeth and hold off diving into my desk drawer for the sarnies and fruit until at least 12.30, but it will be a damned close call.

I’m normally fine in the morning – the bowl of Rice Krispies and endless cups of coffee keep me ticking over nicely, but today…

That’s not thunder you hear, nor are they after shocks from yesterday’s geological wobble. ‘Tis my tum grumbling