Money money everywhere; not a penny to spend

[caddyman]

I find myself having to wander off to the bank at lunchtime to deposit my latest of late payments to the unforgiving mistress that is Barclaycard.

I think that I may be well advised to actually eat my credit cards as I seem otherwise incapable of not using them, and fun though they can be, paying them off is a pain.

Whilst the situation is not yet desperate, the Lea economy is less the stately ocean liner ploughing through heavy seas with a calm majesty, than it is a log raft. So far it has never sunk, but my feet are always wet. I need to find additional sources of income. If the realities of my life matched the tongue in cheek propaganda and cheerful megalomania, I should simply sell a few honours or abolish some monasteries. Alas, both have been done before, so even were I in a position to raise capital this way, it would doubtless be frowned upon.

Selling internal organs is a possibility - and would involve a healthy weight loss, too. Unfortunately,

a) I am a coward,
b) I am using them, and
c) it is probably illegal.

This means of course, that I should really try and rein in my spending and try to pay off a few debts. This is awkward since one of my favourite hobbies has always involved spending money I do not have on things I do not need. Also, my personal credo has always been: Owe the bank a thousand pounds, they have you by the balls. Owe the bank a million pounds, and you have them by the balls.

It's a dilemma, all right. Still, there's always pure, random chance. I might win something.

Note to self: Enter a competition, lottery or something.

Comments

[nyarbaggytep.livejournal.com]

Freeze them in a bowl of water - that way you can only use them with 24 hours to think about it while they defrost.