Wednesday already?

[caddyman]

I don’t know what I have done with my tote brolly, but it’s not in my rucksack and consequently I write to you as a rather soggy customer gently steaming in the workplace. I might nip into M&S at lunchtime and acquire one of their “Jumberellas”, like the one I got for Furtle a while back. Essentially it an overgrown tote that expands to the proximate size of a golf umbrella, which means a) that it keeps you nice and dry and b) ordinary, puny brollies can’t get close enough to pose a threat to your eyes with their nasty, pointy little ribs.

I left poor Furtle in bed this morning, feeling sick. It seems that the transition from Dried Frog to Horse pills has not been a happy one for her stomach and there have been consequent prayers down the great porcelain telephone. Hopefully a lie in, extra rest and plenty of water will sort that out.

For myself, the insomnia seems to have passed – touch wood. A combination of staying off coffee (but not tea) in the evenings, ensuring that I drink more water before bed and sprinkling oil of lavender (dilly, dilly) on the pillow, seems to have done the trick. Of course now I am awoken by the need to pee at 3.30 in the morning, but that’s the trade off, I suppose, as you get older. Broken sleep or no sleep; I’ll take the former. At least you can doze off again afterwards.

My puny work ethic, weak-willed and consumptive as it usually is, is coughing up even more blood than usual in the corner of the office today. It seems unlikely, therefore, that it will be able to goad my conscience, which has already with remarkable sangfroid allowed me to perfect the art of the disguised skive.

There may be further posts as the day wears on.

Comments

A Milligan Moment

[bluesman.livejournal.com]

"a rather soggy customer gently steaming in the workplace"

Moriarty, this boy's a bit of a steamer...