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It seems that someone in the Department – maybe the Permanent Secretary- has decided to take a leaf out of the US Military’s book and institute a surge. This, however, is a surge of surrealism: we have a surfeit of suffusions of yellow. Time and Space has broken and the Jaspers Warp has taken effect.

A woman has just come along carrying a cardboard box and from it she has produced a letter-headed A4 flyer – one for every member of staff. This paper is entitled,

Permanent Secretary’s analysis and Deliver Awards

Ceremony on Monday 22nd September in Eland House


It promises cups and prizes for winners and runners-up. To emphasise the point and help the hard of thinking, there is a cartoon of a gold trophy.

Honestly, this place gets more like Arkham Asylum every day.

”The award for attendance goes to Curtis E Kerr, who has had no sick days off work since his armpit fell off in the winter of 1978.

“Sadly, Curtis cannot be with us tonight, but here is an acceptance speech we taped earlier…


I am looking at the nomination form and thinking...

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